Monday, December 27, 2004
Death to Religion
My lola passed away last dec 17. For the first time in 4 years I actually attended mass, prayed the rosary and washed hands in holy water. My status as a cynic and atheist has taken quite a turn, i don't know if for the better. No, I have not embraced religion back in my arms but I have considered the possibility of a god's existence. BUT if it be the Christian god that most worship then I have not made peace with him...yet. He can sit in his high and mighty throne and contemplate on his lost child while I walk away.

As for the prayers and the mass, i have reaffirmed my beliefs: that death of a loved one brings a huge need for repetitive mantras called prayers. It is that sorrowful chanting of pleas to a god which brings a lot of comfort. It has helped eased my grief. Call me a heretic or blasphemer, I don't care. I do what it takes to live. After all that's all what religion is to me:


To make an absence less than total.

I'm sorry lola. I cannot follow you...

This is MY life.

"If god dosent exist then this life....every second of it...is all we have"
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posted by Rax @ 09:28  

knowing but not intervening...
About Me

Name: Rax
Home: Makati, Philippines
About Me: I am many things: aspiring poet, advocate, lawyer, with a good grasp of reality. I am also passionate when it comes to chasing dreams. After all, a childlike imagination is just something I cannot outgrow. Which is why I write(...and refuse to give up anime, fantasy novels and video games... :P)
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